Eavesdropping
by Laura Schiller
Summary: During one of her telepathic sessions, Kes catches Neelix worrying..."Sometimes I really wonder why a lovely girl like her would want to stay with someone like me."


Eavesdropping

By Laura Schiller

Based on: Star Trek: Voyager

Copyright: Paramount

Tuvok placed both hands on the mind-meld points of Kes's face and caught her blue eyes in his steady brown ones. A candle flickered on the table between them. She took a deep breath.

"Open yourself to your surroundings," Tuvok intoned, the ritual recitation that helped her slip into that listening space in her mind. "Listen to the thoughts, the minds on this ship..."

She closed her eyes and listened. At first, she heard only with her ears: the omnipresent thrumming of the ship's engines, the voices of people talking in the corridor, her own breaths and Tuvok's deeper ones, the faint sounds of their heartbeats. Then she cast her mind out like a net, listening harder, listening further...

Harry Kim was practising his clarinet one deck above her. The Captain was recording a log entry in her ready-room. Tom Paris was firing his phaser at moving targets in the holodeck. B'Elanna Torres could be heard all the way in Engineering, cussing out an unlucky crewman. Neelix was wiping tables in the mess hall, humming to himself.

Kes smiled through her teacher's hands and let herself fall deeper.

_...if only Mom and Dad could hear me now..._

_...two years since we became stranded in the Delta Quadrant, and seventy-three to go – but I refuse to let either myself or my crew give up hope..._

_...Pow! Bam! Take that, sucker!..._

_...don't know what the_ hell _she was thinking! That could've totally overloaded the goddamn sensors if I hadn't..._

_...Hurry up, hurry up, old fellow..let's just get this done so you can be there when Kessie comes home._

Kes zeroed in on Neelix's thoughts. They were warm and bright and flickery, an old-fashioned log fire in comparison to Tom's strobe lights or B'Elanna's phaser beams. He was singing an old folk song of his people, flicking his dish towel back and forth in his slightly off-beat rhythm.

_Not my leola root stew. She hates that. Hmm...maybe one of those Earth recipes Mr. Paris seems so keen about?_ He bristled a bit at the thought of Tom Paris. _Scrambled eggs? So simple even I can't ruin them, he said. Hmph! Maybe I should just replicate something after all – wouldn't want her making that face again._

"Tuvok!" Kes exclaimed, giggling. "I can _see_ something!"

She saw herself placing a forkful of casserole in her mouth, screwing up her face in disgust, and spitting out her mouthful into a napkin in the guise of a cough. She remembered that particular meal; Neelix had gone overboard with the Terran chili peppers again, forgetting that not all palates were as robust as a Talaxian's.

"Are you getting this? Do I really look that funny?"

"I am receiving the image as well, but I am not amused," said Tuvok, signaling mild disapproval through the link. He had become so used to teaching telepathy to his own children that any emotional reaction from Kes automatically earned her a reproof.

"Calm yourself, please, and resume the exercises."

"Right."

Neelix rinsed the towel in the sink and wrung it out, still humming, a dark edge of anxiety now clouding his good mood. _I know she hates my cooking...I know I'm not particularly handsome by Ocampa standards. Sometimes I really wonder why a lovely girl like her would ever stay with me..._

At this point, Tuvok, who was punctilious about observing privacy, withdrew from the meld and took his hands away. Kes did not notice.

She saw another image of herself, brightly colored and hazy as memories sometimes are. The Kes in Neelix's mind wore a pink dress and leggings, bringing out the color in her cheeks and the glow in her short blond hair. She stepped softly through the airponics bay, watering the roses, looking like an overgrown rose herself among the steel shelves. She looked delicate, ethereal...she shimmered with light.

Neelix sighed. There was a wistful, yearning tone to these images, like a peasant dreaming of a princess, rather than a prosperous starship crewmember thinking of his long-term girlfriend. It was as if she might disappear at any time.

Kes reached out to him, without asking if it could be done, and brushed his consciousness with hers, the way she would sometimes brush his cheek with a kiss.

_Neelix, may I...?_

_Kes?! _He dropped his towel and picked it up hastily. _Goodness gracious, you startled me!_

_Sorry..._

_No, no, it's okay! Darling, I'm so proud of you – you've established a link across three decks, that's amazing!_

His pride and affection wrapped around her like a hug.

_Er...you didn't happen to hear what I was thinking just now, did you?_

_I'm afraid I did...and about that, I want to tell you something. Preferably now, so you'll know I'm being honest._

Neelix squirmed. He tried to put up a shield with little success, rather like a man with no umbrella, holding his briefcase above his head in a vain attempt to keep off the rain. _All right. I'm listening._

Kes rolled her eyes; had they been in the same room, she would have tweaked his whiskers. _You sweet, silly man! How could you possibly think you're not good enough for me?_

_What?!_

_I mean it. Here, I'll show you..._

She sent him a collage of loving images: Neelix in the mess hall, wearing his multicolored apron, chopping, slicing and stirring to his heart's content. Greeting every crewmember by name and memorizing their favorite foods. Lighting up the room with his twinkling eyes and beaming smile. Leaving laughter in his wake.

_I haven't changed my mind, Neelix. I love you – so please stop worrying._

_I love you too, Kessie._

She slipped out of his mind, gathered up her consciousness from all the corners of the ship, and tucked it neatly back into her own body until her mind was filled with nobody but Kes.

"I've established a two-way link of mental communication," she told Tuvok, opening her eyes. "Did you...?"

"No, I did not listen to your private discussion," said Tuvok, looking mildly affronted at the very idea.

"Of course not." She blushed. Mind-speaking with her mate was one thing, but having a very proper Vulcan listening in would have been awkward beyond belief.

"You are making excellent progress," said Tuvok.

High praise indeed. "Oh...um...thank you, Tuvok. That's good to hear."

"I was merely stating a fact."

Kes grinned.

_Excellent progress, he said. Wait 'til I tell Neelix!_


End file.
